You can be cute and fat, but you won’t be healthy.

I have spent quite a bit of time in the last 20 years hiding my ‘ass’ets.  There have been too big shirts and baggy jeans, stretch pants, sweat pants and skirts with asymmetrical hems. After so many tugs, pulls and spanx I’ve generally been able to satisfactorily disguise the wide load that follows. Even if the disguise is only a figment of my own imagination, it still worked for me. Or at least that is what I forced myself into believing even as the numbers on my scale increased inch by inch.

A week ago I almost feel into that same trap. I overheard myself telling me that a 30 pound weight loss was good enough. I mean really, I’m out of the danger zone right? I have jeans that fit and bras that kinda work (at 40 things simply…redistribute) so what really is the problem? I should just maintain…

Watching this video sent to me from my local American Heart Association “Go Red for Women” Team reminded me exactly how much it does matter and why it is that I HAVE to do more than maintain.  I know that the larger my waistline the larger my chances for developing heart disease and diabetes. This twin headed beast of a nemesis has been hunting me down since I crossed the 35 and above bracket along with the double X tee’s. So far I’ve been able to stay ahead of if but there have been moments when I could feel it’s breath on the back of my neck. That after all is what brought me to this moment…putting more distance between them and me.

Getting down to a size XL and in some cases L represents a huge accomplishment for me. And I do not want to misrepresent how proud I am that I took my health seriously and have made big strides toward achieving my ultimate goal, optimum health for me. I have my next series of doctor appointments coming up in the next few weeks. I am breathing a sigh of relief because my numbers have gone down significantly changing my preeminent status to ‘at risk’ for both heart disease and diabetes. BUT even if I may be out of the woods with my numbers, numbers being

1. Blood Sugar
2. Blood Pressure
3. Blood Cholesterol and
4. Body Weight (Body Mass Index)

my ‘woods’ had become a full-grown Amazonian Jungle. From where I stand now in this journey, the greenery is still very dense and thick (and yes, this could also be a reference for my thighs). So maintenance is not really where I am, yet.

I have a friend who runs half marathons and 5K’s and goes to the these events where women, who in midlife, have decided to make their health a priority and literally run our town. I want to be like them. I want to run a 5K  or a half marathon. I want to be able to out distance my five-year old on the playground catch him up in my arms with all of his 52-pound-4-foot self and swing him around without loosing a step or feeling like my legs are going to give way under me. I want to teach him how to kayak and go dune-buggy racing with him. I want to be the one screaming with him at the top of our lungs as we climb that monster roller coaster taking us so far past the speed limit it makes us leave our stomachs at go.

Complacency would kill those dreams. Complacency would mean that I would remain where I am today and eek out an existence that pretends this weight on this body is okay. I’d be cute, cause I can dress me and if given more than an hour’s leeway I can actually style my hair and apply makeup without bodily injury. But I won’t be healthy and if I’m not healthy the happy is only for show.

So far since the beginning of these weight loss rules I have lost 4 pounds. This is a good thing and evidence for me that slow and steady weight loss with an eye on carb control and doing what’s best for my body like resting instead of pushing myself past unreasonable limits work.

This week I want to focus on maintaining the first five rules and

1. Exercise. This will mean purposeful intentional exercise. I’m a huge fan of yoga and walking. They help me think and that helps me quiet my mind so I can rest. I commit to walking or yoga each day.
2. Try a new food. I’m pretty adventurous but when it comes to eating I will stay in humdrum state of mind. This week I want to introduce a new food to my son and myself that actually grows from the earth. We bought a mango, but I had no idea what to do with it, so it’s still sitting in the back of the frig. This week I think we should eat it or something else. I hear kumquats are good.
3. Water. Water. Water. My mother has me trying this pH balanced alkaline water. It’s water. But I like drinking it. I don’t know if I buy into it being the elixir of life, but I like the taste and so far I’ve been able to get my 8 glasses plus in without feeling bloated.
4. Stretch past the box. I like to have fun and laugh. This week I bought a kite. I’m not big into kite flying but I wanted to try something different for exercise to get me and the kid out of the house and into some sunshine. I bought a box kite and found us some beach, he searched for seashells, we ran and laughed and the kite fly so high and we walked and talked about what would happen if it sailed into space. Next week maybe we’ll hula hoop…