they walk with me dogging my steps and
holding me up. these shadows once forms i called
granma and daddy. in the midst of my worrying they
catch tears before they fall. chiding me and reminding
prayers are answered whispers so why quake, just wait.
worrying is a no thing that raises my pressure and
aches my brain. every known thing does not require
that i know it. they talk with me guiding me through each
turn. i question everything and now they have every answer. it
makes me wonder is it only in death that i will learn? is it
magic you’re conjuring mama? a question my son once asked
standing on top of the couch cushions watching me wring my hands.
i guess. the answer is yes. i call out their names but before i can ennuciate
the first syllable his presence is felt. to be faster than thought
is magical or miracle or love…they ride in with songs that soothe my
mind when the bill payments get too high or tell me a joke to disarm
angry that normally would lead to another bad choice. what would i do without
these shadows to guide me, walk with me, talk with me, hold me in place?
i have no idea but imagine it would be a space without grace.