so i am now 17,054 words into my national novel writing month challenge. i can honestly say i had no idea i had 17,054 words worth of a story in me. i’m glad that i made the choice to take this challenge, it’s revealed much more about me to me than just words on a computer screen. the story i’ve been writing has so many nuances and the characters are starting to feel like real people. if you have never gotten involved in a challenge such as this, i high encourage you to roll up your sleeves and give it a go. here’s a glimpse at today’s writing (fyi: i changed the main character’s name, she just seemed more like an Anna):

Anna had started to cry quietly. She didn’t realize she was crying until Stacy Ann handed her her table napkin to wipe her face. Stacy Ann didn’t want to offend her friend or push her away. She had no idea how to tell Anna what she felt was burning in her heart to say without doing both. “I don’t know why Alec wants you to have a baby so badly right now. I know he has his own political ambitions and politicians with families do get votes.” Anna opened her mouth to protest but Stacy Ann silenced her. “I don’t want to talk bad about your man. And I’m not going to what I am going to say is you have ambitions. You have dreams. And girl you are damn good at what you do and should not have to compromise any part of it to make anyone happen.

“If you want to have a baby. Have a baby and be happy about it. Don’t struggle against your instincts. That’s what you taught me. Remember? Never go against your first mind because your first mind is always right and your first mind told you to wait to have a baby. It said that for a reason.” Stacy Ann sat back in her chair trying to decide if she should order her friend a cocktail. If nothing else Anna looked like she could use a drink. She had bags under her eyes and her skin looked dry and pale sure signs she was stressed out. Anna face was fuller, and Stacy Ann was sure her hands looked swollen. She wasn’t sure if it was her friend’s cycle or if she was gaining weight but she was worried about Anna.

“I want to be happy.”

“Girl, stop with all this foolishness. If you want to be happy, be happy.” Stacy Ann decided, Apple Martini for the wanna be pregnant lady and raised her hand to motion for the waiter.

“I feel so pulled apart, Stac,” Anna put her head down on the table. When the waiter came over Stacy Ann order the Apple Martini and asked for extra cherries, her friend’s favorite.

“A wise woman once told me that happiness was an inside job,” Stacy Ann repeated the words Anna told her the night she discovered her ex-husband had been cheating on her for the entire 2 years they had been married with his brother’s wife. Back then Stacy Ann had been a wreck completely consumed by the grief of his betrayal and deception. She had no idea how to let go of the life she believed would be her forever. Anna had come to the house with two bottles of Pinot Noir and five UHAUL boxes extra large. She had told Stacy Ann that she would be her forever and together they were going to move Mr. So Over out the door. 7 years later Stacy Ann was a success and happier than she’d ever imagine herself being completely single and completely in love with her singular life. “If you want to be happy you have to start with yourself and not depend on anybody else except Jesus.”

Anna looked up the table just as the Apple Martini arrived. “Now let’s go wash your face and fix your hair. When we get back you’re going to drink down this Martini real slow and then you’re going to put your big girl panties on and make a big girl decision.”